Bad Renters

It's no secret our economy relies heavily on the hospitality industry but there are plenty of secrets Property Managers (PMs for short) keep. It's for your own good, you really don’t want to know they cleaned suntan lotion out of the microwave yesterday or that they scooped live crawfish out of the pool with their bare hands. They quietly keep the gears of our town greased, so to honor them here are some of their stories you never hear and maybe you or your guests will cut them a little slack this year.

"Nobody knows how the TV works. Most people know how to work a remote but the temptation of a 24 hr service line is just too good to pass up, especially at midnight when they are drunk. I usually just wait patiently until they unlock that part of their brain and figure it out on their own. Vacation-brain also leads to misuse of things like washing machines, that they know perfectly well how to use at home but magically forget when they are washing bathing suits instead of bedsheets."

"One spring break some college kids checked out of a beach house. The cleaner kept saying it smelled like pee in the master bathroom. Well, I guess whoever stayed in that bedroom couldn't make it the additional two feet to the bathroom and peed in the dresser drawer. It soaked into the wood and we literally could not get the smell out.. It smelled horrible."

"They always bring more people than are allowed. It's a dead giveaway when '4 adults and 2 kids' go through 30 towels in two days and ask for more. When I came by to drop off more towels, I saw like 25 suitcases and 40 people in the house. They told me, 'oh they are just staying down the road'. Sure they are."

Like the mint on your pillow, here is some complimentary advice from local Property Managers on how make your stay a little more comfortable:

Don't book it for someone else. None of those teenagers staying in the house can pass for "Carol from Tennessee, married with 3 kids" when the PM shows up.

If it says no pets, really please don’t bring a pet. We always know when you do.

Check in and check out is at a certain time for a reason.

We can't control the weather.

If you broke it, we know it, you know it, so just tell us.

Don’t smoke pot, the Sheriff will gladly educate you on Florida's cannabis law

Some may call them local heroes, but we know them as the Property Manager next door. Thanks for all you do! Blog Archive - Search Blog

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